Sand? Seriously?
by Twilight Is My Second Language
Summary: Bella is the most popular person in Forks high.Everyone wants to be or be with her.But the new kid ignores Bella completely. And to top it all off, her past is back to haunt her. A past no one knows about. A past she's trying to escape. 1st fanfiction.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! This is my first fan fiction that I wrote myself…I don't know if it's any good or not but I had a really fun time writing it. I'm not going to beg like most people for you to review. Just read and if you want to review or comment on anything in the story…. Or even just give me ideas on where I could go with this... be my guest. Because, honestly, I was home alone, bored, with nothing to do. So I just started typing. One thing led to another and I this chapter is the result. I have been thinking of ideas for stories I could write though, so I just kind of randomly built on one of the ideas. I hope it's good and that you enjoy it.**

**Chapter 1:**

_Who did he think he was? Ignoring me like I didn't exist. I am Bella swan, I will not be ignored! Bella swan got It, you… you…. Stupid shiny Volvo owner! _

As you probably already figured out, my name is Bella Swan. I'm the most popular girl in Forks' high school. Everyone in school wants to be my friend, all the boys drool over me and all the girls are jealous. I'm hot, pretty, and I have an amazing boyfriend, who wouldn't be jealous of me?, who wouldn't want to be with me?, who wouldn't want to be friends with me?

Well, there is only one person in the whole world, to ever exist that can answer those question. The new kid who just transferred here from New Jersey, or some shit like that, Edward Cullen.

His name makes me want to scream! When I went to introduce myself he ignored me. He stared at me as If I was some kind of idiot and walked off. How dare he?!?! He can't just ignore me like that. It was an insult! He insulted me in front of everyone. Oh! He is going to pay! He better sleep with one eye open for the rest of his life! I will not rest until I get revenge!

*DEEP BREATHS*

As you can tell, I have anger management issues, but that's a story for some other time. I'm getting help for that, along with another little problem at home. It's a long story, like I said, I'll tell you later, right now isn't the best time. I am still trying to calm down, and if I get angry again… let's just say all hell will break loose.

Let's change the subject. I'll tell you about the happy part of my life. I have no siblings, but my 2 best friends, Emmet and Rosalie, are practically family. I have known them since I was 4 years old.

**FLASHBACK**

I sat down in the sand and stared out at the vast ocean of other children. Absentmindedly, my hands were rubbing against the sand. I was thinking about what I would do when I got home, and when my mommy would get back with the drinks. She left a whole 2 minutes ago.

Something was thrown in my face and I lost my train of thought. I felt my eyes sting. I rubbed them with the back of my hand. Sand. Someone threw sand at me. But who?

I looked up to see a pair of green orbs staring back at me. Is this really who threw the sand in my face? It couldn't be. A 5 year old boy with bronze hair.

"Hey! You ruined my sand!" the boy screamed as he kicked more sand into my face.

He kicked 3 more times and then screamed "move already!"

I didn't know what to do. This was my first time in a park. Or this park anyway. I had never had anyone scream at me before. No one even spoke in a loud voice at home. I was scared and I just sat there staring at the boy.

By now I had tears in my eyes. I looked down at the sand that was in front of me and then back at the boy. He let out another scream of frustration and began kicking repeatedly at the sand. I couldn't breath anymore. There was too much sand and not enough oxygen. Then, slowly, everything went black and all the sounds faded. The last things I heard were the boy yelling "You bitch! You stole my spot! You can't just stroll by and be like 'oh I am going to bug the shit out of Edwa-'" Everything officially went black now.

When I woke up I found Rosalie and Emmet sitting in chairs next to my hospital bed.

END FLASHBACK

Later that day I found out Rose and Emmet were the ones who knocked out the other kid and called their mom to help me. Ever since Rose, Emmet, and I have been best friends.

Rose and Emmet are brother and sister. Well actually Emmet is adopted. When he was 3 months old, Roses' parents adopted Emmet. They had always wanted another child, but they just didn't have the time to… put the "egg in soil" if you know what I mean. **(AN: fertilize the egg)**

When ever I asked anyone about the boy that day, no one gave me any answers. They all said stuff like "let what's in the past stay in the past" or "that isn't important know" and what Emmet always said "Why? Did you fall for the guy or something?"

And every night (yes I still think about him, even 13 years later) when I am lying in bed, I think, maybe I did fall for him. Your probably thinking "you fell for a guy who almost killed you, who drowned you in sand! How desperate can you get?" But the thing is when I looked into those green eyes I felt something. And I didn't stop him when he was kicking the sand into my face. I'm no coward, I would usually have said something like "Go away or I'll call my mommy" or "leave me alone, meanie",(hey, I was 4 don't blame me)but I didn't. and as I lay there every night, I thought about it day in and day out, whether I loved this boy or not.

I do still think about him, just not as much. I would never see him again. No point of moping about the past. And besides I have a great boyfriend. My life is fine with, or without the boy.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**Chapter 2:**

BPOV

Ugh! World history is so boring! The teacher began to talk about the civil war and I zoned out, blocking the teacher completely. Not like he would ever pay attention to what was happening in his class. It was only 4th period. Four more to go.

Today was going to be a long day. I could just tell. I fell asleep at 4 am and woke up at 6 am. Two hours of sleep were not going to make my day peachy.

I'm not always like this, you know. I've started getting angry easier these past couple weeks. I don't know why though. It could have something to do with the face that the Edward situation didn't go anywhere, not that I expected him to fall head over heels for me. I may be conceited, but I'm not stupid. It's going to take him a while to start liking me (as a friend).

Another reason why I'm not happy is because my boyfriend is in Chicago for the week. He went to go visit some family up there. I missed him so much, I couldn't wait until he came back on Sunday. I was counting the days, only five more to go.

Guess what? I'm now friends with Alice Cullen, Edward Cullen's sister. She, Rosalie and I are going shopping this weekend. I needed something to take my mind off of my perfect boyfriend. And what was better then going shopping!

The bell rang and pulled me out of my dream world. I quickly gathered my books and rushed to fifth period, language arts. At least this would be fun and I wouldn't have to pretend to be paying attention.

We were reading "The Tell Tale Heart" by Edgar Allen Poe. That guy had some serious problems. He killed someone because he didn't like the color of his eye. And he kept saying he wasn't insane through out the story, and he tried to prove he wasn't. the more he tried to convince the reader that he wasn't insane, the more insane he sounded. **(AN. Sorry to anyone who likes The Tell Tale Heart or Edgar Allen Poe) **The whole class even had an argument with the teacher on why they didn't like it. It turned out to be a pretty good class. Tomorrow we were going to be reading "The Cask of Amontillado". Yay! I am actually looking forward to that!

Next I had lunch. Thank goodness I was half way through the school day. I slowly made my way into the lunch room, not wanting to be the only one at the table Rosalie, Emmet, and I (and now Alice as well) sat at. Once I had sat down I took out my cell phone and called my boyfriend. No one seemed to notice me sitting down, Rosalie and Emmet were wrapped up in each other and Alice was absent. While I waited for him to pick up, I stood and scanned the cafeteria for Edward, _maybe Alice decided to sit with him today. _

I finally spotted Edward sitting across the cafeteria… and looking at me. Our eyes locked and I could feel my knees weaken as I looked into those amazing green eyes.

I could hear someone saying 'hello' in my right ear. Oh shit! The phone.

"Yeah! Hey. Hi. Sorry."

"Oh, hey honey. Look, I'm so sorry, but I can't talk right now. Can I call you back in a couple of hours?"

" Yeah, yeah. Sure. Love you, bye."

"I love you too."

I hung up and sighed. I missed him too much. I sat down, placed my cell phone in front of me and stared at it for about 5 minutes when the bell rang. _That was a really short period. Or at least it seemed like it. Well, thank goodness. The faster the day goes by the better. _

All of us had classes in different parts of the school, so we would always stop in this one spot, that was where 4 hallways met, and say 'goodbye' until the next period, which all of us had together. Normally I would go to 6th period with my beau, but since he wasn't here…

Emmet, Rosalie, and I stopped at our usual spot and me and Rosalie waited patiently for Emmet to finish his joke before we parted. Once he did, all three of us cracked up. It was actually _funny. _

My laughter stopped dead in its tracks when I saw Edward walk by with his arm around Jessica Stanley's shoulder. JESSICA STANLEY'S SHOULDER! Wait a minute… why is this bugging me. It's just Edward for God's sake!

I was pulled out of my thoughts of Edward as two arms went around my stomach; pulling me close to someone guys body. I was about to turn around and slap whoever was touching me but I heard something. His voice.

"I missed you." He whispered quietly into my ear. I closed my eyes at the sound of his velvety voice. And then it hit me. my eyes shot open and I turned around for confirmation. Yes! It was him!

"JASPER!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. Normally I would have been embarrassed for being so loud, but right now I didn't care. Jasper, my boyfriend, was back from Chicago early. I was too happy to care. But I did take one look around to see who all was staring at me. Apparently, no one was, except one person. Edward Cullen.

Our eyes met…again. And I lost my train of thought…again.

Dude, if this is going to happen every time I look at him then I really, really need to get a restraining order or something.

I turned away from Edward to look at Jasper. Jasper. I can't believe he's back.

"Why are you back so early?" Not that I didn't want him here right now, I had missed him so much.

"I missed you way too much. And, besides, I couldn't leave you all alone in 6th period. How would I live with myself?" He flashed a bright smile at me and, I swear, if he wasn't holding me right then and there and I wasn't worried about the school seeing me, I would have fainted. I smiled back at him and wrapped my arms around his stomach and placed my head on his chest. So in simpler words, I was hugging him. I felt his arms tighten around me.

"I'm so glad you're back. I missed you more then you'll ever know." I said.

Emmet interrupted not so long after. Both, him and Rosalie were being so quite. I almost forgot they were there. "Don't worry Bells. I'll tell him everything he needs to know later. For example, how much you cried everyday 'cuz he wasn't here, how many times a day you would zone out and begin day dreaming about him, you know. Things like that."

I blushed. It wasn't some small blush, it was huge, and my whole face went red. I broke the hug and whacked Emmet in the arm "Shut up!" I turned back to Jasper who was laughing.

His laughter was my second favorite thing in the world right now. The first was him, himself.

Jasper and I hadn't had sex yet. I just wasn't ready. We hadn't even kissed. Well, we had on the cheeks but that's it, not on the lips. I really wasn't ready for anything like that. We only hugged. And Jasper understood, even though he didn't know why or what had happened. I know I sound like a nun, but my life has been messed up enough and it took me forever and a lot of therapy to lead a normal life. Now I'm the most popular person in school, so apparently the therapy worked big-time.

**Hey people! I wanted to let you guys in on my schedule and stuff. I just moved across the country a couple of week's back, so I'm still adjusting and stuff. I get a lot of homework. Yesterday I was up until 1 a.m. doing homework, and I woke up at 5:30 am. So anyways, I will be updating, about, once a week. And if I don't get a lot of homework and my parents don't drag me out of the house, maybe twice a week. So yeah. Have a fun weekend everyone!!! **

**~ Special Snowflake. **

**(No one except one person is going to be able to understand this. Sorry about that. One of my best friends added is reading this story, so I add inside jokes to the story and stuff. Well, I haven't added any yet, except for Edgar Allen Poe, but I will in later chapters.)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**Hey guys! I've been really busy. I have so much homework it's not even funny. I usually get done with my homework around 10PM. But I'm not making it an excuse… yet. I promised you guys a chapter every week and you're going to get it. Hopefully. But if I am unable to do so please forgive me.**

**Chapter 3**

The weekend…

Jazz was really busy this week making up all the tests and quizzes he missed and doing the homework we had done in his absence. So we didn't get to go out, but we are tonight. I'm so excited! I haven't gotten even 10 minutes alone with Jasper. Tonight, since it's Friday and Charlie is gone and not coming back until tomorrow afternoon, I can stay out as long as I want.

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Jazz picked me up at 6:15 PM sharp. Which wasn't surprising, Jasper had a tendency to be on time for everything. Anyways, when he got to my house he carried me to the car. We remained in a comfortable silence the whole way.

Jasper is so adorable. I wonder were he's taking me. Is it a restaurant? Maybe the movies? Doesn't matter where we are as long as I'm with Jazz. I've never felt this way about a guy before…

Did I just seriously think that?!?! Panic, panic, panic, panic, panic, panic, panic, panic!!!!! Not that line, please not that line! That's the line every girl says in a movie when the whole audience knows it and the girl doesn't; she's in…. *gulp* love.

Am I really in love with Jasper? I like him a lot, don't get me wrong, but… love?

I was so deep in thought I didn't realize the car had come to a complete stop until Jasper called my name out.

"Bella? Earth to Bella." Jasper was saying while waving a hand in my face.

I turned to look at him and snapped out of my daze. I shook my head to clear my thought.

"Sorry." I smiled up at him and took his hand to get out of the car.

The movies. Jasper brought me to the movies. And not just any movie theater; the best one in town and we were watching the movie I've been wanting to watch for a month, Bride Wars.

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The movie ended around 8:30 PM. Jazz put his arm around my waist when we got up and kissed me on the cheek. I just smiled and sighed. We started walking towards the car.

The parking lot was completely empty, except for me, Jazz, and some other person that was farther into the parking lot. Jazz felt like being random, which was pretty normal for him.

"Imagine Emmet coming to school in his underwear, staying in it the whole day and thinking it's a dream." I said to Jasper. Jaspers eyes went blank and his left twitching. That just cracked me up. I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe; soon Jasper joined me and was laughing as well. That's when I looked away from Jazz and turned my head forward and froze dead in my tracks. I was no longer laughing. Jazz noticed the change in my mood and immediately stopped laughing.

"Bells, what's wrong?" he sounded really concerned, it almost made me sad. Almost. I was too scared to be sad right now. By now I could feel the tears on my cheek and I knew, even though I couldn't see it, my eyes were as wide as they could be. I could see Jasper from the corner of my eye. He followed my gaze and then leaned down to whisper in my ear, without removing his eyes from the figure about 20 yards away from us. Even that seemed like too little. I thought I had a restraining order.

"Do you know him?" Jasper whispered into my ear, but I was too scared to answer. I just kept staring; the fact hadn't registered yet. I could see the figures face twisted into a menacing smile. Oh how I hated him. I hated him more then anything in the world, even more then Edward. He took a step forward and all of a sudden everything became clear. He was back in front of me, in an empty parking lot. For all I knew he would kill Jasper and me. No, I couldn't let anything happen to Jasper, It doesn't matter if I get hurt as long as Jasper is fine.

"Why?" I whispered so quietly only Jasper could hear me. And he turned to look at me and from the corner of my eye I could see his confused face. "Why are you back you bastard?" I yelled. I started taking slow steps back, and Jasper and he stood in their place.

"What do you want know?" I yelled a little higher. My back hit the rear of a car and I stood there, trying to push my way through the car, even though I knew it wasn't possible. I started crying harder, but I refused to let my tears blur my vision. I wiped them away and took a deep breath.

"Don't touch me! Get away from me! Leave me alone! Get away from me!" I yelled as loud as I could. "Don't touch me." I whispered to myself. Jasper just kept staring from me to him and his smile grew 10 times. He looked just as scary as he had then. He took a step forward, just to scare the shit out of me, as if it wasn't already. Jasper could sense something was wrong, obviously, if me screaming my guts out wasn't reassurance enough then I have no idea how that boy passes his classes. When he took a step forward Jazz stepped in front of him.

"I think you should leave sir." Jasper said in a final tone. He looked at me one last time and gave me a wink, which made me shudder. But, thank goodness, he left. Once he was gone I slid to the ground and let the tears fall freely. Jasper didn't ask me anything. He just carried me the rest of the way to the car and inside to my room, onto my bed.

Once I was lying on the bed, safely, Jasper turned to leave.

"Jazz?" I said with my eyes still closed.

"Yes Bella?"

"Please don't leave tonight. I don't want to be alone. Charlie isn't coming back until tomorrow." I opened my eyes to look at him. He was smiling. That just confused the hell out of me.

"I thought you'd never ask." I smiled back at him and Jaspers smile grew. He came and lay down next to me. I turned to snuggle into his chest and sighed with contentment. Today may have been one of the worst days of my life, but having Jasper here right now made it better.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. **

**Okay. Now this is why I rated it T. Beware!!! **

Chapter 4

Stupid sun! Why did it have to rise?! My whole body hurt from the tension. I forced my eyes open and looked around. Relief washed over me when I looked to my left and saw Jasper sound asleep. At least I didn't have to be alone the rest of the day. I carefully got up and went to take a shower.

I Stepped out of the shower and realized I didn't bring any clothes with me. Crap. The only thing I could wear was a towel. That's it! Nothing else! I tied the towel around me tighter then ever and slowly crept into my room making sure not to wake up Jasper. I walked over to my closet and opened the door. Was there anything in here to wear! All my clothes were dirty! Are you kidding me?! They HAD to be dirty right now! When I needed them the most!

I felt some ones arms around me. Jasper. He was up, but how did I not hear him get up? Whatever, like it matters. I sighed "Good morning." He slid two fingers up my arm, leaving a trail of goose bumps and pushed my hair onto my shoulders. Oh God!

He kissed my shoulder and I felt a shiver go up my spine. I could feel him smile on my shoulder. "Good morning to you too." He finally replied. I wanted to melt in his arms. Before I knew it we were on my bed and he was kissing my neck.

I didn't even have time to think if I wanted this or not. But it didn't matter. My past caught up with me within seconds. It was like it was happening all over again. I could see his face; I could feel the fear, the pain. It was almost like Jasper had been sent from my own personal hell to torture me and remind me of were I came from. I forgot all the love and support he had given me. All I could think about was how Jasper just wanted the same thing as him.

"No" I said as I pushed Jasper off of me. "Stay away from me! I've had enough of you. You can't ruin my life! Not again! I won't let you. I won't allow it!" I yelled as I walked backwards to the wall on the other side of the room. Tears were rolling down my cheeks. I just wanted to get out of here.

Jazz looked confused and frightened. He took a step towards me. "Don't. You. Dare. I don't want you near me. Get out! Now! I mean it!" He stared at me for a long time and then quietly walked to the door. "I love you. And when you're ready to talk, I'll be waiting." He said before leaving. But I couldn't even look at him right now. He disgusted me, he was using me, I knew he was. He was just another teenage boy who was obsessed with sex and wanted nothing more then that.

I heard the front door close, the engine to his car start, and fade away. I stood up and took out the dirty clothes from my closet. I looked for something in there that wasn't too dirty and wore it. I didn't care anymore. I needed to talk to someone. The only people who knew about my past were Rosalie and Emmet.

I got in my car and drove over to their house. Their parents went to a religious thing every Saturday. I never really bothered to ask any more about it. But the good thing was that I had a key to their house and their parents weren't home. This meant I didn't have to worry about them prying. I let myself in and walked to Rosalie's room and opened the door.

Oh. My. God. I was scarred for life.

**Hey guys! Sorry about the ending. I discussed this with one of my friends and I decided to have one major event per chapter, but I had to make it go fast. So yeah. Anyways I hope you like this chapter! And yes I know its short but I promised you guys a chapter every week. So it was either break the promise or put up a short chapter. Love you guys and if you have any ideas on what I could do next let me know because I have major writers block! **

**  
~ Special Snowflake.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Read note at the end it is very important!!**

Chapter 5

This was so disturbing; on all levels. Not the most disturbing thing though. I turned around and ran to the door. I reached for the doorknob but a hand beat me to it. I didn't want to turn around, not after what I had seen. I don't think I could ever face wither of them ever again. A chill ran down my spine. I had to turn around. I found my self looking into Emmet's eyes when I did. But I had to look away. I walked past him and made myself comfortable on my favorite lazy boy. When neither of them made their way to the sofa in front of me I let out an impatient sigh and said "I'm going to listen to what you have to say, you know."

Finally he and Rosalie were in front of me. They sat down uncomfortably and, it was obvious, they were trying hard not to touch.

Emmet started. And for the first time he called me by my name, not Bells or little sis or anything. "See Bella when two people-"

I cut him off "I've had the sex talk Emmet, can you just explain to me _why the hell the two of you were making out like there was no tomorrow?!?!_" Yes, you heard correctly. I walked in on Rose and Emmet, my two best friends, the brother and sister, making out. For all I know if I hadn't walked in on them they would have been making love in about 15 minutes.

Rose took over from there. "Bells, Emmet and I are in love. We have had feelings for each other for 6 years. We just opened up about them a couple of months ago."

"So you guys have been banging each other for 2 months and yet you didn't bother to tell me, that my best friends, me brother and sister, were in love?" Excuse my language, but I was furious. I could see the horror and guilt on Rosalie and Emmet's face, but I didn't bother to say anything further.

"I have to go." I mumbled and ran out the door. I sat in my car not leaving their driveway. Then I remembered what had happened with Jasper. I couldn't take it anymore, I needed to cry and damn it I had a right to! I pulled my legs to my chest and cried. I have no idea how long I cried, but I know I fell asleep while doing it. When I woke up I was in a familiar room. I knew this room like the back of my hand. But I couldn't remember how I got in this room and that scared me. I looked around, saw a familiar face, and relaxed. I closed my eyes again. "What time is it Rose?"

"It's 12:30, Bells." She paused as if choosing her words carefully. "You want to talk about anything?"

"Jasper and I, kind of, broke up." I said as low as I could. Even though I knew she could her me, there was some part of me that didn't want her to hear me. There was some part of me that wanted to hate her for hiding the whole her and Emmet thing. But then there was part of me who knew that Rose was the only person I could tell, her and Emmet of course. So I told her the whole story. Starting from the man in the parking lot to the part were I freaked out when Jasper started kissing me. **AN: I know this probably sounds weird, but Jasper didn't kiss Bella on the lips. So they still haven't had their first kiss. **

By the time I finished I had seen so many emotions cross Rosalie's face, it was hard to count how many there were. She stared at me for a few minutes and then looked away. "I'm- I'm so sorry Bells." She whispered. The tears were starting to roll down her cheeks. I hugged her with all the strength I had left. All this drama had drained my energy. At that point I knew, no matter what, I would always have my two best friends at my side.

And as long as I had them I could face anything; Jasper, Edward, the world. But I wasn't so sure I could face the guy from the parking lot the day before, James.

**IMPORTANT!!! VERY, VERY IMPORTANT!**

**Hey guys! Okay so I said I would never ask you guys to review. Right? Right. Well I'm breaking that promise because I made a bet with one of my friends. She said I couldn't get, at least, 8 reviews on this chapter. I told her I could. So people PLEASE review! I need to win this bet! Oh and I know I said I would be putting up a chapter per week, but I can't until I get the 8 reviews. It's all apart of the rules and stuff. SO PLEASE!! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

I stayed the night in Rose's room. I never left it. She brought some food for me upstairs. But, honestly, I didn't even want to look at it. Even thinking about food is making me sick. I am so freaked out right now.

_James is back in town. _He's back to ruin my life. And here come the water works. I have been crying all day. What's wrong with me? James. That name sickens me. That sick, sick, bastard. If I could I would kill him. You're probably thinking 'Enough with the suspense already! Just tell me who James is!'

Remember earlier when I said I had many problems at home and they were a story for another time? Well, this is that other time. See James is my father. He and my mother married 19 years back. Since the day I was born both of my parent treated me like royalty. Except, when I was 6 years old my mom left me with James all alone for the first time. She had to go to a business meeting and he was my dad. Two days after she left I had a nightmare and woke up in the middle of the night. I started crying and stumbled out of bed and through the dark hall I stopped in front of the door at the other end of the hall way.

Still half asleep I rubbed my eyes and unsteadily opened the door. Of course, James never went to sleep earlier then 5:00 a.m., so he was awake. I guess he was watching something on T.V. that made him all "sexual". And you probably know how the rest goes. After that night, he would come into my room every night until my mom came back from her business trip. I was too afraid to tell her what had happened. I was afraid if I told her, James would come to my room that night.

So a few months passed by and my mom left for a couple of days for another business meeting. She came back early and when she didn't find James in his room when she returned she came to check on me. And what did she find? James on top of me.

The very next day me and my mother left town and went to go stay with her mother in Forks. There she met Charlie. From the first day I met him I knew he was different from James.

So now you know who James is. Ever since I have had intimacy issues. I wasn't even able to shake hands with anyone for a year. I wore nothing but long skirts, oversized tops and sweatshirts until sixth grade.

I don't really know what happened in sixth grade. It's kind of unexplainable. I, literally, just woke up one morning and felt like a new person. I didn't want to wear my baggy clothes. I wanted to wear clothes that were my size; nothing revealing, but nothing that made me look like a nun. That day 7 different guys asked me out. I never went back to the old me ever again.

**Hey guys!! Yes. I'm back!! Whooo!!! Thanks for the eighth review ****call me !!! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys! I'm finally back! And schools almost out for me! Only 7 more days! DONE WITH FINALS!! WHOOOO!!! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter 7:**

Sunday passed by the same as Saturday, mostly. I stayed in Rose's room the whole day and cried. Her parents called Charlie and told him where I was. On Monday, I went to school with Rose and Emmett.

So far, the day wasn't half bad. I hadn't seen Jasper the whole day. By lunch I could even smile. Rose, Emmett, and I walked into the cafeteria and sat at our normal table. Before long Alice came bouncing up to our table, dragging a very annoyed looking Edward behind her.

"Hey guys! This is Edward, my brother," she turned to Edward, "And Eddie this is Rosalie, Emmett, and Bella." Emmett and Rosalie smirked at the nickname and Edward grimaced, but I didn't even crack a smile. Edward nodded at our general direction, and then leaned down so his face was near Alice's ear. He whispered something to her and in response she rolled her eyes and nodded.

Edward, without a word or even looking back at us, left the cafeteria. I was left staring after him. _What's up with him?_ As soon as Alice sat down I got up. "I have to go."

"Are you okay Bells?" Emmett and Rosalie said in unison.

"I'm fine. Just need some fresh air. Clear my mind, you know." Rose and Emmett nodded.

"You know where to find us if you need us and we have out phones handy in case of an emergency." Rose said. I nodded and bolted out the cafeteria door. I made my way down the halls and stopped in front of a long empty hall. No one knew about this place. I came here to think sometimes. I went all the way till the end of the hall, where a door was. It was barely in sight, you couldn't spot it unless you knew to look for it.

I carefully opened the door and slipped in. It had been a while since I had come here. The last time I was here was in eighth grade. I still remember how I found it.

**FLASHBACK**

"Yeah! Run, you little wimp!" She yelled as I slipped out of the hallway and frantically looked for somewhere to hide. The tears started to fall. I tried to fight them back but the urge to cry was too powerful. So I gave up.

I ran down the sixth grade hallway and turned into the electives wing. I kept going until I made it to the end of the hallway. I had two choices. I could either turn back around or go down the hallway to my right. I thought about it for a second. Then a ran down the hallway on my right. When I made it to the end of that hall I fell to the ground, too weak to stand. But then I heard voices coming closer.

I forced myself up and saw a door I had never seen before.

"Bells! Where are you?!" I heard Rose call me. But I just wanted to be alone.

"Come out; come out, where ever you are!" Emmett said.

"Bella, please come out." I heard Jasper yell. I could hear the desperation in his voice. I almost reached for the doorknob, swung it open, and ran into his arms. Almost. I slowly started backing away from the door, as if it were infected with a deadly disease or something. I kept backing up until I was in a dark corner. Here, I felt safe. I sat there the rest of the day. When it was time to go home I quickly gathered my things and ran to the car waiting to pick me up, without running into Rose, Emmett, or Jasper.

The next day they didn't ask my anything about it. They knew better then to bring it back up. We all pretended like nothing happened. Rose and Emmett were good at concealing their worry. But I could see the worry written on Jasper's face so clearly, it scared me. From that day on, I spent as much time as I could in the room I had discovered.

**END FLASHBACK**

I sighed. It felt so good to see this place again. It was like an old stored away auditorium. There was a stage and rows and rows of dusty seats. I walked down the aisle, towards the stage, running my fingers across the dusty chairs. I loved this place. It was like a second home to me.

I sat down on the unusually large window sill and stared out the window. It had started raining. I watched the raindrops hit the window and slide down. I loved the rhythmic sound of it. I rested my head on the window and closed my eyes. I felt better already. I can't believe I stopped coming here.

"What are you doing here?" Someone said from the side of the stage. I jumped up and turned around, my heart was racing. I hadn't expected anyone to be here.

I let out a sigh of relief. "God! You scared me for a second, Edward!" I sat back down on the window sill, except this time letting my legs hang under me. Edward chuckled. _This was the first time I was talking to him in my whole life, and it feels like I've known him forever._

"You didn't answer my question." He said as he made his way next to me and sat down on the window sill as well.

"I'll tell you, if you tell me. But you first." I said in a very final tone. He sighed.

"I found this place my first day here. I liked it here. It was quiet. It was away from everyone else. It was-" I cut him off, by continuing his sentence for him.

"Like a home away from home. Somewhere you could come and hide if things got too bad in the outside world. Some place that felt safe, like it could and would protect you from everything. No danger could possibly reach you. Not while you were within these walls. And even if you just wanted to be alone. Get away from all those sick bastards and skanky bitches out there." I sighed as the memories flooded back. But this time, instead of pushing them aside, I welcomed them, challenged them even. I heard a low "wow" from my right. Oh, right. Edward was still there. I had forgotten he was in the room. I turned to him and blushed. "Sorry for cutting you off. It's just what you were saying brought all these memories-" This time Edward cut me off.

"Don't apologize. That's a lot like what I was going to say. Except for the sick bastards and skanky bitches part." I blushed again, remembering my explicit words and Edward chuckled. In the distance I heard a bell. _Oh shit! We're still in school!_

"Edward, the bell just rang," I said to him while jumping off the window sill, "We're going to be late if we don't leave now."

Edward smirked. "I'm not going to class Bella. I'm skipping." He jumped off the window sill.

"Suit yourself." I turned to leave. Edward grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him. "What are you doing?" I whispered to Edward. He was still holding one wrist and his other hand was on the small of my back to make sure I didn't move. I actually didn't feel overwhelmed with the intimacy of our position. I actually felt comfortable. It has taken forever for me and Jasper to start hugging. But Edward seemed different.

"Skip class with me?" Edward whispered back, looking up at me through his eyelashes. I felt my knees weaken as our eyes locked. Wait a minute, what happened to that restraining order?

"Yes." I said barely audible. He had heard me though. I don't know how he did. I could barely hear myself. He was grinning. He let go of me suddenly and walked to the stage. "Do you play?" I asked him, noticing the grand piano sitting in the middle of the stage.

"Yeah, I taught myself a few years ago. You?"

"No, I play guitar, drums, and sing."

"Sing, huh? You any good?" He asked raising one eyebrow.

"You want to be the judge of that?" I asked flirtatiously. Wait a second! Am I really flirting with him?! I mean I just broke up with my first love. And I'm already flirting with another guy? And not just any guy, Edward Cullen. The Edward Cullen I wanted to kill not so long ago.

"Why don't you come up here and sing me something?" I nodded and went to sit next to him on the piano bench.

"What do you want me to sing?"

"Anything. It's up to you."

"Okay…" I thought about what I wanted to sing for a minute. And all of a sudden I knew what I wanted to sing. I slowly stood up, took a few deep breaths and began.

_Uh huh  
Life's like this  
Uh huh, uh huh  
That's the way it is  
'Cause life's like this  
Uh huh, uh huh  
That's the way it is_

Chill out, what you yellin' for?  
Lay back, it's all been done before  
And if, you could only let it be  
You will see

I like, you the way you are  
When we're drivin' in your car  
And you're, talkin' to me one on one  
But you become

Somebody else  
'Round everyone else  
Your watchin' your back  
Like you can't relax  
You tryin' to be cool  
You look like a fool to me  
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?  
I see the way you're actin' like you're somebody else  
Gets me frustrated  
Life's like this you  
You fall and you crawl and you break  
And you take what you get, and you turn it into  
Honestly, you promised me  
I'm never gonna find you fake it  
No no no

You come over unannounced  
Dressed up, like you're somethin' else  
Where you are ain't where it's at you see  
You're makin' me

Laugh out, when you strike a pose  
Take off, all your preppy clothes  
You know, you're not foolin' anyone  
When you become

Somebody else  
'Round everyone else  
Your watchin' your back  
Like you can't relax  
You tryin' to be cool  
You look like a fool to me  
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?  
I see the way you're actin' like you're somebody else  
Gets me frustrated  
Life's like this you  
You fall and you crawl and you break  
And you take what you get, and you turn it into  
Honestly, you promised me  
I'm never gonna find you fake it  
No no no  
(No no no)  
No no  
(No no no)  
No no  
(No no no)  
No no)

**Hey guys! I'm planning on picking up the next chapter from here. But it's 12 am and I have to wake up at 5am. And I've been going to sleep past 1 in the morning for the past week. Anyways, I'm going to start updating more often!!! **


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

**Chapter 8: **

I closed my eyes shut and a tear slid down my cheek. Every time I listen to that song I get all emotional. I could relate to the song.

A month after Jasper and I started going out, he began hanging out with the preps. He kept trying to get me to do the same, but I didn't. He was apart of their group and if I became apart of it too I would be known as a prep. I didn't want that. I didn't belong to a specific group. I hung out with whomever I wanted.

So anyways, Jasper started hanging out with them more and more. There were times when I didn't see him for weeks, even though we went to the same school. When he missed me enough he'd come and see me. He'd just show up. No call, no text, nothing. He completely changed. He kept trying to act all cool, but every time he did I would just laugh at him.

I could deal with it, though. I could deal with him changing, because I liked him however he is. Because I knew, in the end, he was still my Jasper. The kind, caring, funny, sweet, and considerate guy I fell for.

Then one night we went to the movies. The guy behind the concession stand was trying to get our order ready. I thought he was doing ust fine but Jasper was thinking other things.

"Hurry up already! We don't have forever! God damn it! How hard can it be to get such a simple order?!" Jasper screamed at the guy. I put my hand on Jazz's shoulder trying to calm him down, but instead he stiffened.

"Relax Jazz. The movie doesn't start for another 20 minutes." I said in a low soothing voice.

"Relax? You expect me to relax? This idiot is taking forever! Are you that stupid?" Jasper said in a low, scary voice; his teeth clenched. I stared blankly at him. _Did he just call me stupid?_

A little too late, Jasper realized what he had said. His changed from anger to guilt in seconds. "Bella-" he started, but I cut him off.

"Don't you dare say sorry. You're not sorry. And don't you dare tell me you didn't mean it. Because you did Jasper. Go to hell." I turned around and started to walk away. I had gotten a few feet away, when I turned back around. "Oh! And let me know when MY Jasper gets back." I said, putting an emphasis on "my".

The pain was evident on his face. But I really didn't care. Yes, I liked him a lot. And yes, I did hurt to see him in pain. It took all the strength I had left to fight the urge to run back to him and wrap my arms around him. But I didn't. I called Rose and asked her to come pick me up. In 10 minutes Rose's car was in front of me. As soon as she stopped in front of me Jasper came out of the theater doors.

"Bella! Will you please let me explain?" He called as he ran after me. But as soon as I saw him I ran to the car and jumped in. I told Rose's mom, who was driving, to go. I didn't even bother to look back at him. I just started crying. And crying, and crying. For the next month, I escaped into the hidden auditorium.

I couldn't even face Jasper. But I had heard from Rose and Emmett that he wasn't hanging out with the preps anymore. And during lunch he sat by himself. So after a month or so, when I was sure he had become himself again, I talked to him. He apologized for everything, and I gave him a second chance. He didn't mess up again, until Saturday.

The tears came faster now, that was the only memory I had pushed back; Saturday morning. I didn't want to think about it. I felt so numb every time I did. I began sobbing and fell to the ground I rested my head against the leg of the piano. I felt Edward softly grab me and rock me back and forth. I knew I was drenching his shirt with tears, and he knew it too. But he didn't stop me. He just kept pulling me closer too his chest and rubbing my arm.

Finally the crying subsided. And I looked up at Edward. I could see the worry in his eyes. But why was he worried? I mean, this is the first time we have ever actually talked. We're acting like we've been best friends for years. "Want to tell me what that was all about?" Edward asked. I shook my head.

"I just have a lot of issues. And I'm kind of going through a rough time right now. My whole world is caving in on me." Edward didn't push me to go on. He just nodded and helped me up.

"By the way, you're an amazing singer. I've never heard anyone sing that well before." I blushed and looked at the floor.

"Thanks," I whispered. I knew Edward heard me because i heard him chuckle in response. I looked up at his smiling face. I felt my heart skip a beat. _Damn that crooked smile_.

Edward and I skipped the rest of our classes. We sat in the auditorium and talked and talked and talked. When school ended, Edward gave me a ride home.

I flopped onto my bed. Today wasn't half as bad as I expected. All thanks to Edward.

**Hey guys!! I know it's a crappy ending! Sorry! I wrote half the story on Friday and the other half on Sunday and it came out really messed up!**


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

**Chapter 9:**

I walked down the familiar aisle towards the stage. This time I was alone, I think. At least I hoped, I think. These days I didn't know what I wanted.

It had been a week since that day with Edward. And since that day Edward had barely talked to me. It wasn't like he was ignoring me; we were just busy in our own worlds. He had Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory throwing them at him. And I was dealing with James being back and trying to avoid Jasper.

Ever since the break up I had seen him three times. Each time I saw him I felt like running and hiding in the auditorium. But I didn't. I walked with my head held high. I may have had a messed up past but I still had dignity. It did hurt seeing him though. And I knew it hurt him too. I had too face the music sooner or later.

I choose later.

I was sitting on the windowsill again. But this time I was writing a song. I sat there and stared at the blank paper. This used to come so easily to me. But lately I can't seem to wrap my mind around anything. I just stared, and stared, and stared at it. Soon my mind drifted to other things.

Before I knew it I was thinking about Edward. I was thinking about that beautiful head of bronze hair. Those perfect lips. God, and those eyes; those alluring green eyes. I felt like staring into his eyes forever. God! I really have something wrong with me. I hated Edward up until last week. And now I was day dreaming about him. Great, just great.

Suddenly I had the perfect idea for a song. I started writing. Within 20 minutes I had the whole song done. I read over it and smiled sadly. The song was about James. It was about Renee. It was about what had happened that night. Tears started rolling down my cheek with the memory. I was crying silent tears for the next 10 minutes. Finally I stopped and sat there. I brought my knees closer to my chest and curled up into a ball. I buried my head between my knees and sat there until I heard a voice.

"I should have expected you here. You come here a lot don't you?" I knew that voice. Suddenly a fresh wave of tears came. I looked up and sure enough, there he was.

I don't know what came over me, but I suddenly felt this urge to be in his arms. So I jumped off the windowsill and ran into his arms. He wrapped his arms around me almost instantly. I felt so safe right now. I cried till the last tear. And, like last time, he didn't stop me or anything.

"Shhh Bella. It'll be okay." He kept saying. Want to know something messed up? I actually believed him. Even though he was only saying it to make me stop crying. I looked up at him. He looked so concerned and worried. Either he actually cared or he was a really good actor. I smiled as brightly as I could. He smiled his crooked smile. My breathing hitched. I blushed.

All of a sudden he looked anxious. He wanted to tell me something. "What is it Edward?"

"Bella." He stood up and turned his back to me. I got up and stared at him. "Bella, I have to tell you something. I know it's going to freak you out but I need to tell you. It's important I tell you this now and tell you fast before I chicken out." His back was still facing me.

"You've got my complete attention." He turned and looked at me. He took a deep breath and mumbled something. "What was that, Edward? I didn't quite catch that." He took another deep breath and repeated himself, except louder.

"I'm in love with you, Bella."

**I know you hate me for doing this right now! But it was too tempting! I had to end it here! I'll put up the next**


	10. Chapter 10

I stared at him. I didn't know what to say. How did he expect me to answer to this? I hope it wasn't by an 'I love you too' because I didn't love him. I think I was actually in love with Jasper. God! Did life have to be so horrible to me right now?!

I was perfectly content with being just friends with Edward. If that is what we were. But now everything is so fucking awkward! Did he ever think before acting. Then it hit me. He did think, he thought I was in love with him too, or at least liked him as more then a friend. Damn it!

"Bella?" Edward's voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I did the only thing I could think of. I turned around and walked out the door, tears closer to slipping with every step.

Once I was half way down the hall I heard footsteps behind me. I didn't even bother to look back, I just walked faster.

I emerged from the electives hall and froze. _Holy shit. Just my luck. _

Right in front of me, standing there, was Jasper. I still had time to run away. He hadn't seen me yet, he was talking to one of his friends, his back towards me. I wanted to run away, but I was too shocked. Not shocked that I was seeing him in school, but shocked by my fate. One guy, I barely even know and hated up until a couple weeks ago, just told me he loves me, and the guy I think I might love, is standing right in front of me.

It's not like I hadn't seen him around school before, this was just…different. The hallway was empty, except for 3 people, soon to become 4 (can't forget that Edward's running after me. That reminds me, where is that boy?).

I was frozen in my spot. I just stood there, staring at Jasper. I was paralyzed. I saw him wave good-bye to his friend and turn around. He froze too.

We just stood there staring at each other. After about a minute, he glanced over my head, and I knew Edward was standing behind me. I heard Edward take a step forward.

But, honestly, I didn't care. Right now, the only thing I could see, or care about, was the pain in Jasper's eyes. For a second I was confused. I had no idea why he was hurt. But then something clicked.

Imagine your ex, who just broke up with you a couple weeks ago, and has been avoiding you, come out of a dark hallway followed by a guy. What would you think was going on?

My eyes widened at the fact that he could even think that, I would barely kiss him, and I had known him for years! Did he actually think I would make-out with some guy I knew for a couple weeks?!

Jasper turned back around and started walking away. He had only taken a few steps when I found my voice.

"Do you really think I would do something like that?" He turned around, his face blank. I knew him well enough to know what that meant. He wouldn't say anything until I was finished talking. But I didn't want him to listen to me talk. I wanted him to talk. I don't know about what, but I was desperate to hear his voice.

I started walking towards him. "God! You've known me for all these years, and after everything that happened, you seriously think I would do that?!"

By now, I was standing right in front of him. I was a couple of feet away from him. He was staring at me and still had that stupid blank expression on his stupid face! God! I he was making me so pissed right now! I felt like slapping him!

I knew I had to do something to break him. Otherwise he could last hours. I was getting desperate. I _had _to hear his voice. I _had_ to do something. I did the only thing I could think of.

I closed the gap between us and pressed my lips to his. I closed my eyes, but I didn't need to keep my eyes open to see the surprise on Jasper's face.

At first, he was completely frozen, but slowly he melted into the kiss. And I melted into his arms. My arms snaked around his neck and his arms around my waist.

He pulled me closer, increasing the intensity of the kiss. At that moment, there was no one there but him and me. Nothing else mattered. Nothing else was important.

We finally pulled away for air. He rested his forehead on mine. Both of us were breathing heavily. I was beaming, and so was he.

"Wow" he whispered. I couldn't help but laugh at that. He laughed with me. God, did I miss that laugh or what. I actually felt my heart skip a beat.

I hugged him. I rested my head on his shoulder and placed his head in the crook of my neck. I sighed; I was so happy right now. That kiss was much, much better then him speaking. Not that him speaking was a bad thing.

"I love you, Bella." Jasper said, as he turned to face me. I could see the love, the sincerity, and the kindness in his eyes.

"I love you too, Jazz." I whispered. I heard someone clear there throat behind me. _Crap. Edward. _I turned around slowly.


	11. Chapter 11

**My best friend in the whole entire world helped me write this.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter 11**

I wasn't sure what to say at this point. Talk about awkward…

I did the first thing that came to mind; apologizing. Though I wasn't sure for what, I just had an urge to do so. I could practically feel the pain and hurt just by looking in his eyes.

"I… I'm s-s-sorry Edward," I shook my head in frustration. I didn't know how to continue. "So sorry."

My sincerest apologies didn't seem to help at all. There was fire in his eyes, and I could feel the heat from where I was standing. Without a word, he spun around and stalked in the opposite direction. He continued until I could no longer see him in his furious state.

"Hey, are you okay?" I had completely forgotten that Jasper was in my presence. To be frank, I wasn't even sure if I was okay myself. I had finally gotten close to Edward, and now I had lost him again. I doubted even the slightest chance of talking to him ever. He probably hated me---I was sure of that. Maybe one day we could muster up a conversation, but our friendship was down the drain.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I lied smoothly. Jasper, knowing me so well, saw right through it, but he also knew I didn't want to talk about it, and let it slide. For now, at least…

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

2 months later………

Our relationship in the past months had been running smoothly. However, Edward hadn't spoken a word to me since that day in the hall. I had been right when I thought our friendship was over for good.

The only issue with Jasper and I was that he knew I was hiding something from him.

I had decided. This was the day. I was going to do it. I had to face the music.

"Come on! I don't have forever Jazz!" I said as I dragged him into an empty class room.

"What's the rush, Bells? That desperate to have me?" He said with a smile.

I playfully slapped his arm. "Shut up!"

I carefully closed the door to the classroom and locked it to ensue maximum protection. **(AN That's what she said :D).** I didn't want anyone to hear what I was about to tell Jasper. I turned back around to find Jasper leaning on a desk, staring intently at me.

He smiled at me and I shifted uncomfortably under his intense gaze. He didn't seem to notice, though.

"What?" I asked him. He looked at me in silence for a moment and then shook his head.

"Nothing, I was just thinking."

"About?" He raised an eyebrow, as if to suggest I should know. "Is this about why I brought you here?" He shook his head again. He pulled me towards him and placed his hands on my hips. I quietly rested my hands on his chest and waited for him to continue.

"No, I was thinking about us." I smiled at that. I leaned forward and placed a peck on his soft lips. "So, why did you bring me here?" He asked after a few silent minutes. I sighed and closed my eyes, trying to gather enough courage to say something.

"Jasper," I whispered.

"Yes, Bella?" I could hear the worry in his voice without even opening my eyes.

"I have to tell you something. And it's really important, so I want you to listen carefully. Okay?" I opened my eyes and looked up at him. He nodded slowly.

I took a deep breathe and sat down.

**Hey guys! My best friend in the whole entire world is here for a week, and we're going on a road trip, so she helped me write this chapter before we left. One of my other best friends is going to help me write the next chapter when I get to New Jersey… hopefully. Hope you liked this chapter!! **


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight….. bloop :P**

**Chapter: 12**

"I have to tell you something. And it's really important, so I want you to listen carefully. Okay?" He nodded slowly.

I took a deep breathe and sat down.

I was going to tell him everything right now, even if it killed me. "Jasper, I know, that you know I have a past that I was not comfortable to share with you… until now." I sounded like I was 37 instead of 17. I looked over at Jasper, since he was silent.

He nodded as if to say "go on". So I did. I told him everything. From the first time James raped me to the last time I saw him. In the parking lot. With Jasper at my side.

The whole time I was staring at the floor, not being able to look Jasper in the eyes. When he didn't say anything at all, I decided to risk a peek. I glanced over at him and noticed he wasn't looking at me either. He was staring blankly at the wall in front of us.

He was probably soaking it all in. So we sat in silence for the next 20 minutes. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I needed him to talk to me, to look at me.

"Jasper," I said; my voice barely above a whisper. But he still didn't turn. "Jasper." I said with more force this time. He sighed at looked at the floor, still not looking at me.

"I... I need time to think. I need time to take this all in." He whispered. He looked me in the eyes and I knew he was in pain. Whether he was feeling my pain from the past 17 years, or he was in pain from leaving me, I didn't know.

A few tears slid down my cheek. I was afraid it would come to this. I had a feeling it would. I knew it was an option, but I didn't think he would actually choose it. I was lost of words so I nodded, very slowly.

Silently he walked out of the room; leaving me, and all my pain and misery behind. I collapsed onto the floor and curled up into a ball as the tears fell harder.

After a few minutes I realized something. I was vulnerable here. I needed to make it to the auditorium. I stood up quickly, wiped my tears away, and made a run for it. I didn't stop running until I was back in that old, dusty, room that felt like a second home. I sat down at my usual spot, the window sill, and let the tears, I had been holding back as if it were a life or death situation, fall.

I lost track of time, and my senses. Slowly, blackness took over. And I drifted off into a peaceful slumber.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

When I woke, I was in a room. And not the room I fell asleep in. I looked around, and noticed the room was not familiar what-so-ever. I was so drained from all the crying I didn't have the energy to care where I was. Slowly, I slipped out of the bed, ready to explore.

I made my way into the kitchen, hopeful to find some water. I took a big sip of the cold water. Once done with the glass, I left it on the counter.

Despite everything, I smiled. I was acting like I owned this house, and was not brought here without permission.

Most of the lights in the house where turned off, except for the lights in the kitchen and dining room. That combined was enough for me too see clearly through out the house. I decided to watch some TV, since I wasn't sleepy anymore.

I searched the downstairs part of the house for a TV. I made my way into the living room. _Bingo!_ Found the TV. I looked around the room for the remote. That's when my eyes landed on the couch.

It took me a while to realize the figure on the couch was an actual person and not a bunch of pillows.

I walked over to the couch. I was half afraid to move the blanket that was covering the person's face. I took a deep breathe and my shaky hands slightly lifted the blanket. Enough for me to see the face, though.

I gasped and jumped back as soon as I realized who it was.

**Hey guys!! Back from my road trip! Even though I wish I wasn't. I miss it so much. But I'll get over it. So… yeah… here's your guys' chapter!! Hope you like it!! **


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… numnumnumnum

Chapter 13

I gasped and jumped back as soon as I realized who it was. Edward.

How the hell did he find me? Then it hit me. The reason I had been so comfortable in this house was because, somewhere deep inside, I knew that Edward was the one who brought me here. And, even though I only knew him for a little while, I still trusted him with my life. Which is kind of strange because it took me a very long time to get that comfortable with Jasper.

He was the only, besides me, who knew about the auditorium. But what confused me was, why did he bring me here? Why did he care what happened to me? After everything? Or was it just me? When I walked away from me that day, I had assumed that he had broken all relations between us.

But, from what I had learned when we were friends, was that Edward could surprise you.

I decided to let Edward sleep. I crept back upstairs, being sure not to wake Edward up.

I slipped into the room that I was sleeping in just two hours earlier. I gathered my belongings, made the bed and crept back downstairs. I made my way to the door and stopped. _Maybe I should leave him a note or something. He might worry about where I disappeared to. _I turned back around to find some paper and a pencil. Then another thought entered my mind.

_But, why would he care what happened to me. He probably only brought me here because he didn't want me to be stuck in school and have no way of getting home._ So, I turned around again.

_But what if he actually gets worried? _I turned around, again.

_But he probably won't. _I thought, turning back to the door.

_But he could. _My thoughts were making me crazy now. Making me, once again, turn back towards the hall that lead to the living room That's when another thought came.

_He probably didn't, though._ So, I turned back towards the door.

_And, if he does care what happens to me?_ I thought with a smile as I turned back around.

Wait a minute. Rewind. Did I just smile? At the fact that he might actually care what happens to me? Why do I care if he cares? I mean it's not like I like him or anything.

My eyes widened to the size of frying pans. No, it can't be. It can't, it can't, it can't, it can't. No, no, no, no, no! I can not be in love with Edward. I love Jasper. I can't.

It's impossible…right? 


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter 14:**

For the next week, I tried my best to avoid a run in with Edward. I knew that if I saw him I wouldn't be able to keep what I had recently discovered from spilling. I also avoided Jasper. Not just because seeing him reminded me that he had left me in that room all alone. But because I was hoping if I stayed clear of them I might be able to make up my mind about which one I truly love.

After a week, I decided it was safe to venture away from my very careful attitude the last week and go take a much needed trip to the auditorium. I knew Edward wasn't going to be there this time, unlike every other time I had been there, because he was in a class he actually enjoyed this period.

As I mumbled the words to 'fireflies' by Owl City, I ran my finger across the red seats. I took a deep breath, taking in the smell of rotting wood that always came from this place. But I still loved it.

Instead of going to my normal place, by the window sill, I made my way to the grand-piano on the stage. I ran my fingers across the keys, as well, and sat down to play it. But I didn't know what to play. I sat there for a few moments pondering.

Suddenly I was startled by a voice, "What about the Ode to Joy?" said the voice as if it were reading my thoughts. I knew that voice anywhere. I didn't want to turn around. What was he doing here? How did he know I was here? Jasper had to leave now.

I wanted to turn around and scream at him for coming here. I wanted to ask him what he was doing here. How he even knew where this place was. But instead, without even turning around, I said, "I'd much rather play Clair de Lune."

He didn't respond, but I could hear his footsteps getting closer and closer. He finally stopped a few feet away from me. A few moments of silence passed between us. And after those moments nothing else was needed to be said. I knew what he wanted to say, and he knew what I wanted to say. All without even a glance his way.

But we also knew that our thoughts had to be spoken aloud, no matter how well the other understood. I nodded to his unasked question to sit down. He quietly crossed the remaining space between us and filled the spot next to me. "I'm so sorry for walking out on you the other day. I just had to think through some things. Not about 'us', but how to deal with 'us' now that I know."

Tears were welling up in my eyes. This was everything I had wanted to hear from him. Everything I had wanted him to say and to feel. But somehow it didn't feel right anymore. And I that had just occurred to me and I knew, for the first time since I has known Jasper, he did not know what was going through my mind. I finally turned to Jasper, looking at him for the first time in weeks.

"Jazz…" I whispered, "I don't feel the same way." Jasper's head turned to me in shock. And I nodded, once again answering his unasked question: are you serious? I gave Jasper a quick hug and went back to my spot.

Jasper left not long after and I began thinking about Edward.

_(Dream Sequence)_

I was sitting down in the sand and staring out into an ocean of blur. Everything was hazy. I couldn't even see the back of my hands. I kept rubbing my eyes, hoping to clear my vision.

Finally my vision cleared and my eyes fell upon a very familiar looking five year old boy. He had green eyes, which held anger and frustration. But for some odd reason they attracted me. They seemed comforting maybe even loving.

Suddenly, something was thrown in my face and somehow I knew my eyes were supposed to burn, but they weren't. I rubbed them with the back of my hand. Sand, I could feel the grains. He threw sand at me.

Everything finally fell into place.

"You ruined my sand!" the boy screamed as he kicked more sand into my face. The boy quickly morphed into an older looking boy and all of a sudden Edward was standing in front of me, kicking sand into my face. He kicked 3 more times and then screamed "move already!"

I was scared. And not of the fact that I was re-living the worst day of my life over. But because this time it was the one that I loved trying to kill me.

By now I had tears in my eyes. I looked down at the sand that was in front of me and then back at the Edward, who had morphed back into a little five year old boy again. He let out another scream of frustration and began kicking repeatedly at the sand. I couldn't breath anymore. There was too much sand and not enough oxygen. Then, slowly, everything went black and all the sounds faded. The last things I heard were the boy yelling "You bitch! You stole my spot! You can't just stroll by and be like 'oh I am going to bug the shit out of Edward'" Everything officially went black now.

_(Dream Sequence end)_

I screamed as I startled awake from that horrible nightmare. That boy was… Edward? No, it wasn't possible. It couldn't be the same Edward, no matter how similar they looked.

I finally decided that tomorrow I would confront Edward, Rosalie and Emmett about my newly discovered theory. Let's see what they have to say about the subject. Either I'm completely wrong and a total moron for thinking such a thing, or Edward was nothing like what I thought. And Emmett and Rosalie didn't even warn me. And they supposedly know who the boy is.

**:::IMPORTANT::: Hey guys! Sorry for not updating sooner! I've been so busy. Okay, so lets get down to business. You guys seriously need to review to tell me whether u like it so far. Because if I don't get at least another 100 reviews I'm going to assume you guys don't like the story and abandon it. No offence people, but I don't want to write something that no one likes. So if you like it and want me to continue PLEASE leave a review. And yes I said I wouldn't harass u guys about reviews but desperate times call for desperate measures. **


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